I get into a little light religion here and there, and really enjoy going on YouTube and watching the denominations tear each other up. On The Eighth Day God Made Texas was a little jab at a guy I caught trying to tear the Salt Lake City Temple down brick by brick.

Ah So! was actually a much older article, but the song has remained so much the same I just dusted it off and threw it up. Saw a Chinese billionaire today, as a matter of fact, and yet again wonderer, didn’t these people used to be communist?

I drew Scared from the fact that most people are scared of the government. You simply can’t watch Lavoy Finicum, Ruby Ridge or Waco (2) and not be scared. We’ve become a nation of people trying to keep our heads down. With the upcoming rally in North Texas on June 4th, security is a major concern because no one really knows what the BLM is going to do. These people make up the rules as they go along, and will shoot you on the side of the road! Scared! Yeah, good title.

What We Burn In Our Crazy Mind goes back to my theory that the government us useless.  I can’t name one time in my life that I’ve seen the government successfully carry out anything. And SECRETS? Clinton couldn’t carry out a date with the secret service on the lookout for the wife!

Every now and then one takes inventory. With a writer that involves getting up one morning and believing that they’ve never produced anything in their life worth a flip. Stripes was such an inventory. John Lennon had his moment right before he wrote “Nowhere Man.” After that dark moment you really should chart a course of action, hopefully one that works. Consequently, here you are reading this article. In the words of Billy Joe Shaver, “I sold some songs in Memphis, sold one in LA too. I’ve sold some songs in Austin, sold songs in Austin too. Unless I miss my guess folk, Ima sell this song to you.”

As soon as I pulled my head out of my little pity party my sense of humor returned, and I picked the funniest bunch of screw ups I could find to break out; The Federal Reserve. I’d actually just read a very informative article on this, but it was too wordy for Texas so I just boiled it down to My Business Plan. I had to come up with a good picture so I picked a pimp. I used a white pimp so the libtards couldn’t call me a racist.

The week wound up with I Don’t See No Trump Train. I was rather amused by Ted Cruz choosing a running mate the day after picking himself up off the mat. I’ll never understand politics. Donald Trump is putting the wood to the establishment and he’s establishment! The election is gonna be “Yuge!”


I Don’t See No Trump Train

IMG_2791Little political analysis here. Tuesday night Donald Trump stomped a mud hole in Ted Cruz’s butt, and walked it dry. Yeah, that’ll do it. Pretty much sums it up. And what does Cruz do? Why he names some dropout to be his running mate. In Nashville there is a saying. When two weak songwriters get together they produce a weaker song than either one of them could do individually. Clueless Cruz. Elvis didn’t do no drugs! Update that to 2016. I don’t see no Trump train.

Trump took a couple of good hits in Iowa and Utah.  That’s because Cruz knew the political game and played it well. Trump is not a politician, which is why people are flocking to him. Now, if you listen to the main stream media Donald Trump is the most despised man in the country. But them people just keep voting, and voting, and voting.

Trump is learning. Remember when I told you about his Southern Strategy? Well, I was spot on. Now look at the eastern seaboard. Do you think he didn’t use that same plan there, because if you don’t have I got a bridge for you, and it’s on sale! There are much smarter people than me who cite things like “contested conventions,” and delegate counts, but let me ask you…is that the will of the people? Then there is the reminder that the Republican Party is a private organization and can run their cigar store any way they like, but let me ask you again; if the candidates opposing each other are picked by such a system, is that the will of the people?

“Oh, Wilbur, you just don’t understand how politics work.” Ok, I’m not versed, but then neither is Rocko in Philly, Bubba in Austin, or Lin Chang in San Francisco, but you know what, we’re the people! We’re not worried about the rulesl. We just want someone  to count the votes, and the guy (or gal) with the most WINS! The Republican Party is exposing itself for the snobbish men’s club that it actually is. They are so far removed from their constituents that they could be in China. And the main stream media chiming in with their cover to support the illusion. Elvis didn’t do no drugs, and they can’t see the Trump Train while they’re sitting right on the tracks!

Post Turtle


As we watch the rules of the game evolve, the march to the White House continues, and the Post Turtles abound. More about that later.  I’m amazed that Obama doesn’t seem to realize how lame of a duck he is. And all this talk, and innuendo about his possible third term. NOT! Just stick a fork in Obama, he’s done. He’s looking for a legacy. Well, global warming, which was caused by all the hot air coming out of his administration. My word to the loyal opposition: Ok, you got your black guy, now it’s time to move on.

Donald Trump is taking the nation by storm, in spite of the main stream media polls telling us that everyone hates him. Cruz? Well, what can I say? Ted Cruz came blazing out of the Tea Party not long back, even got on the cover of Texas Monthly holding the Bill of Rights. He gathers a few victories, but frankly folks, I’m a Texan, and I fully understand taking a butt-whipping and spinning it up into a win for the public, i.e. the Alamo. In any twelve step program there is a first step where you have to at least admit things are screwed up. Ted ain’t gonna win. Then, there’s that other guy, the ringer, who hangs on, and hangs on, and hangs on, like an ex-wife you owe a boat load of child support while she’s living with some guy named, “Animal.” You remember Animal, don’t you. The guy she ran off with. Well, that’s this guy.

Mitt Romney rattled his chains, and the fat lady ain’t sang on that one yet. Side note; I spent the better part of the weekend watching two things. One was re-runs of “To Catch a Predator,” and the other was long, boring videos on how the Mormons are going to take over the world, and their prophet is the “Beast.” The Predator series, because I just love to drink Jim Beam and watch stupid, and the Mormon thing because I just love to drink Jim Beam and watch stupid. Remember “Deep Survival?” Well, that’s Mitt Romney. Uh, he ain’t gonna win either. Next.

Sanders. I love to watch him speak. Same deal, drink Beam and watch stupid. He comes off just like those guys in that kitchen with a six-pack, and a package of condoms trying to say that they were on the way to the library when they accidently lost their clothes in some thirteen-year-old girl’s mom’s garage. This guy is a stone hippy. He could play a part in a Cheech and Chong movie. You know, where Cheech is in a straight jacket on the floor of some nut house, and Sanders offering him, “The Key?”

Then there’s Hillary, Presidente Designado. Liar, Liar, pants on fire, and considering the size of those pants that would be a bigger fire than the one at the embassy in Benghazi. The email scandal, what’s that? Hillary was so stupid that what she did was akin to a cheating husband saving his love notes to his girlfriend on his wife’s iCloud account. Cheating husband, Hillary, I digress.

All of the above, save one are “Post Turtles.” What’s a Post Turtle, you ask. Well, I’ll tell you. So you driving along some country road and come upon this gate with two posts on either side. On top of one of them is a turtle. Now, work with me on this. The turtle didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he’s up there, he’s elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what dummy put him up there in the first place. POST TURTLE! Trump is not a post turtle. So, we watch and see if the will of the people will prevail, or will some new reality series distract us, and we end up with a post turtle. Ya’ll be cool!


On The Eighth Day God Made Texas


On the eighth day God made Texas. I found it in the Bible!

And God saw everything that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them.

And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.

And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.

Then God began to consider. Looking at all He had made, and the man, and the animals, the rocks, the trees, oceans, and the fish therein, and He saw that something was still missing. For God knew man for what he was, and knew that man would stray like a child in a school yard. There needed to be one place, one people, who while being flawed, and would make mistakes, would still retain God’s original plan, and be willing to act on it, so on the eighth day God made Texas!

As you know, I spent some time in Utah recently. I studied the culture there, enjoyed the mountains, met the people, and found a society that had evolved from a hardy pioneer stock to populate an area that no man in his right mind would even have a second thought about. I returned home, and as luck would have it, I ended up on my porch alone last night, and that’s never good because I begin to think. My night progressed to YouTube and I first researched the Great Salt Lake. Yeah, I’m boring, but I’m old, bear with me. Then I watched a slew of stuff on Joseph Smith, including what looked like the Disney version of his life. Yeah, I watched the whole movie. The night wound up with a presentation by some guy who was a former Satanist, turned Mormon, and then got “born again.” (Wait for it.)

This learned gentleman went through great lengths to slander Smith, and finally produced his “proof” that the Devil had inspired Brigham Young to draw up the Blue Prints for the Salt Lake Temple. Ok, I’m just a Simple Ol’ Boy From Austin, but I did have a twelve pack so I continued. That was. . . special. I notice little things. Real things. And the more beer I drink, the more I notice. Hey, it’s a “Texas” thing. One thing I noticed was this cat did an entire segment lambasting the LDS “Garment.” Now, for the uninformed the “garment” is a form of underwear worn by Mormons for a physical reminder of the adherence to their beliefs. They have these little symbols on them, and there is an entire ritual concerning the wearing of this cloth. Well, first he tore into the symbols, going back to Babylon or someplace, but finally settled on the Masons. (This is my surprised face.) If you ever want to see a religious nut go off, just bring up the Masons. Anyway, he cited Bible verse after Bible verse showing how God hates underwear. I’m listening to this idiot, but still couldn’t help but wonder how Marie Osmond looked in her underwear. I digress.

Then, an angel appeared unto me. I looked upon the angel, and the angel was magnificent. Funny thing about angels is that you can never tell if they are male or female, what with the long blonde hair, the fair features. I suspect this was a California angel. Anyway, I walked up to the angel and I said, “What?” And the angel got holy, and powerful, and resounded-duh. And the angel said, “Look at that fool’s head!” So, I did. On top of his head was this little beany kinda like Spanky used to wear in the Little Rascals. So here’s this hypocrite ranting and raving about someone’s drawers while he’s wearing a religious symbol of his own right on top of his head. Wisdom comes in small doses, folks. He ended his lecture with the conclusion that the Mormons were in a vast conspiracy to take over the world, with the cooperation of the Devil of course, and would move the Oval Office to a Mormon Temple in DC about a block or two from the White House. (You can’t make this stuff up, people.) That, and Joseph Smith set this all up on some hill in New York one hundred and ninety-three years ago. I can get this same kind of nonsense out of Frenchi if I run a few shots of Tequila through her, and I’m quite sure she looks a lot better in her underwear than he looks in his!

I called it a night, but this morning I caught a Charlie Daniels video Pale Horse, and that scared the pee out of me all good and proper. Ok, let’s cut to the core. Let me do a refresher for you from Wilbur 101. There is a God Hole in everyone’s head. People try to explain their situation by filling that hole. Now, there is a creative force in the universe, and if you don’t believe that just try to make a leaf. Left on its own, this pretensity will lead to millions of conclusions, all different, all filling the hole with whatever. Religious thought is organic. When the dots don’t connect, just make more dots. Let’s look at some facts, shall we?

Fact: The man in the lecture never changed. He just traded one addiction for another. It always amazes me that when some people find “God” they immediately try to impose their “God” on other people who are trying to fill their God Hole. They do this by finding fault, and of course, if the other person doesn’t agree then it simply must be the Devil!

Fact: The Mormons are not going to take over the world. ISIS won’t let them. Whenever you find an organization that seems to be doing well there will always be people who theorize that the success of said organization must be from, you guessed it, the Devil. Hence you get an old man trying to rip everyone’s underwear off whilst wearing Spanky’s Beany.

Fact: The US has gone to hell in a handbasket. You don’t have to connect any dots there, just look out the window. Shucks, look in your wallet. While I don’t believe in any “Illuminati” I do believe that there are a host of fools out there who think they’re Illuminati. And Masons? A bunch of old men in funny hats with their own secret handshake and an apron! Now, there is a link between Masons and Mormons. Joseph Smith was a Mason, and borrowed their rituals for his “Temple.” You will also note that Ted Cruz stuck his hand in his coat for a picture and walked away with Utah quite handily. (You can’t make this stuff up, folks.)

Fact: Never forget that we Texans are the only people left who will hold up in a church and shoot at you. We’ve done it twice now.

Conclusion: Texas will eventually divorce our unfaithful wife, America. We don’t buy into secret handshakes, underwear, symbols, or any of that other nonsense. What we do buy into is constitutions, oil, cattle, tech, real money, and freedom. Oh, buy the way, we just went on the gold standard again. Ya’ll didn’t know that did you. While you were looking under Obama’s hair for horns we quietly solidified our economy. Jus’ Sayin’. The Texans heading this all up are like my friend, Doc Greene. He filled his God Hole with, well, GOD! You remember Him, don’t you? The guy who made Texas. Beam me up, Scotty.



The Eight-Hundred-Pound Gorilla


There’s an eight-hundred-pound gorilla in the room, and Donald Trump is exposing it. With the fiasco in Colorado, the hypocrisy of the RNC is becoming so blatant that it defies logic. In times before the elections were rigged, but were so fogged with smoke and mirrors that it was hard to see. In a close race there was always the illusion of a fair count. A candidate would get 52% or so and it would be declared a winner by a “landside,” with a “mandate,” and the general population accepted it. Trump came along, and he’s so blasted hot that there’s no margin between him and say, Ted Cruz. So, you got Ted lagging behind Don, what do you do?  Why, have an election without any voters. Just give the delegates to Ted, all of them, and tell the citizens of Colorado to just suck it up. They have marijuana in Colorado, but they’re not that high!

The RNC is very clear about the fact that they can make up the rules as they go along. They have the contenders chasing the twelve hundred some odd number to assure nomination like a donkey after a carrot that he’ll never eat, and all the while, making sure that it is understood that even should someone attain the magic number it won’t matter because they will simply broker in someone who will lose to Hillary, the New World Order person of choice. Meanwhile, Hillary sucks up to the black vote in the southeast, and they don’t know, or don’t understand what she did to ACORN. They just hear the word, “Clinton” and file right in line down at the voting booth. Bill Clinton portrayed himself as a liberal with his assault weapon ban, thereby claiming to have saved the black race from itself. You think Donald Trump is a capitalist? Did someone say, “Clinton Foundation?

Right now the main stream media is putting out stats, and figures showing Bernie Sanders is blowing the doors off, and if you’ll notice, Hillary is oblivious to this. Wanna know why? Cause it’s a lie, that’s why. Someone has to be pitted against Hillary at the convention to make it all look legitimate, but the song remains the same, and the fat lady will sing by the time it’s all over. Remember when I told you there weren’t any golden plates? Well, quivering, shaking old men don’t get elected president either. Just certain things that won’t happen. As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t doubt if the RNC is propping up Sanders to help this along. For all those out there trying to catch me in a typo, that last statement was not one of them. I said exactly what I meant. The REPUBLICANS are fronting SANDERS to rig the election on both sides. Now, do you understand? Do you finally understand.  They only trump card is Donald Trump!

Trump don’t play the game. Trump is not part of the organization. Trump is not a “made man,” in the Mafia called American politics. He’s Bugsy Siegel! There is no way the powers that be are going to let someone like Donald Trump get a piece of the “action.” So what’ll happen if they actually stomp over the population, and proceed with business as usual? Well, I don’t think there’ll be a Civil War, but I do believe that there will be a renaissance. Remember back on the day when the Catholic Church ran the show? Then Martin Luther nailed his little love note to that door, and suddenly all the power that the church had went away like so much cotton candy. What “The Donald” has done is exposed the system for what it is. It’s no longer the line from Alex Jones screaming about a “fix.” It is an eight-hundred-pound-gorilla disguised as an elephant.

This is going to generate a whole new breed of politician. Trump may lose this election, but he will win the war, because if they pull off this coop d’etat it will so offend the population that grass roots organizations like the Tea Party will find new life. Short story; they won’t look like outsiders anymore because killing Trumps run is a blow against mainstream America. We will all feel the sting. That eight-hundred-pound gorilla will begin to look like Cheeta! Barack Obama divided this nation like no other president since Lincoln, and Trump has gathered support from all demographics. Before November we will all know the gorilla quite well. All we gotta do is stuff him, and put him in a museum right next to that freaking elephant.

The Cookie Jar

Nothing like getting your hand caught in the old cookie jar! First off one shouldn’t believe anything they read in the National Enquirer. I remember when they used to run pictures of monkeys with cigarettes in their mouths, claiming aliens had landed. That having been said, over the years, their score card has improved. And so it is with Ted Cruz. Ted accused the reporter, Roger Stone of copulating with rodents. Certain learned individuals have suggested that Cruz sue the Enquirer, but he won’t. Wanna know why? Cause he probably did it, that’s why!

Ouch, Ouch, swat them bees. Trump denied having anything to do with this one, but after Cruz did that spread on Don’s wife’s butt, Trump said he’s drop a bomb on him and here we are. I think there are up to about thirty-five butts in this mess. I’d love to get into this, but I’m going to be honest. Simple ol’ boy time here. Do you really think that Ted Cruz has been screwing around that much? I mean, it is possible, but c’mon. He reads fairy tales to his daughter during his filibuster against ObamaCare, he dances with her during breaks in the debates, he’s more public than GOD, and his wife hangs with him all the time. Roger Stone is a sleaze bag liar.

I said last week that I wasn’t going to get into this mud anymore, and I won’t. The Trump train churns on, but he really needs to distance himself with this kind of thing. One on one, without the drama, Trump will trump Cruz. He’s just too strong, and this is his time. Sometime in twenty years or so, Ted will return, and do something great, but this is not the year. That’s not so bad. Donald Trump has stirred up a populist revolution, and Ted, unfortunately, is part of the very thing that the revolution is revolting against. Ted is still a rising star. Heck, look at Hillary. Losing Alaska to Sanders by eighty percent. The cold never bothered her anyway. The Bush era died with Jeb, and Hillary will be the last of the MoClintons. Trump is a definite change of direction.

If Donald Trump is going to give himself dignity then he needs to control his temper, and Tweets, and start to at least act presidential. Finding Ted Cruz’s wallet in a whorehouse is not good politics. Attacking his voting record, and policies is. Trump is sharp, and he’s basically a nice guy. The country is gravitating toward him. Use that! If you wanna slander Cruz, just keep reminding folks that he’s a United States Senator, that’ll do it. You don’t have to mess with his wife or supposed girlfriends, just run pictures of him in front of the capitol. Now there’s a whorehouse if I ever saw one. And, like I said, over the years Cruz will hone his skills, develop his style, and who knows, maybe, someday, he will have a shot.

Meanwhile, don’t believe anything you read in the Enquirer. The Main Stream Media is bad enough, I mean, you’re reading me for information, ok? I support Trump because the country needs a change, not because there’s anything fundamentally wrong with Ted Cruz, and I certainly do not think he is an immoral man. In fact, I’m offended by that accusation. I’m a Simple Ol’ Boy From Austin, and the image of Cruz dancing with his daughter is stuck in my head. On the other hand, I need publicity. Hey, Rodger! Did you know that I once lived with three dancers in a double wide trailer and changed my citizenship to marry another girl before I took off to New York on a blind date, leaving my family behind? That’ll look good on the front page. And here’s her picture not blurred out. I’m the goofy one on the left.






Why Am I Sitting Outside?


It took me three days to drive up to Utah, and my hands paid for it. Had the same problem when I went up to Long Island to fetch my third ex-wife. Naturally, if your hands hurt you don’t tend to write much, but you think a lot! You think about things like, “Why am I sitting outside in twenty degrees smoking a cigarette, and where is there a cup of coffee with coffee involved?” I think the entire state of Utah is a park, and it should be. It’s almost as if they planned this place.

You simply cannot come here and not be aware of religion. Hence, the first article to come out this week was The Farm Boy, The Angel, and the Religion of Peace. It is said that there are two angels that look over you. One, on your right shoulder is a nice guy, who preaches to you about the Ten Commandments, and the other one is a bit like Clint Eastwood. The Mormons used to be bad, and I mean Porter Rockwell bad, but sometime after they dispensed with all them wives they got politically correct. As the Beatles once sang, “Get back to where you once belonged!” When it comes to a bunch of camel jockeys vs real Americans, my money goes on the Americans every time. The LDS people have been dormant for over a hundred years, but I think if they ever wake up Allah will have something to contend with.

Utah went for Ted Cruz in their caucus. Ted used his usual, mealy-mouth, snake in the grass, dirty trick, running a picture of Donald Trump’s wife from another life to secure it. When Don’s wife Lost the Caucus, I was taken aback, but then I learned the real demographics of Utah politics i.e. the old ladies run the state! Old Mormon ladies take a dim view of naked butts. Being an old “Reptile Bait,” myself, I hadn’t noticed. (I was too busy looking at her butt!) Combine this with the fact that I went up to about six-thousand feet here, and got into a whiskey drinking contest with my retired Navy brother in law, and God dimmed the light of my wisdom. I’ll always feel that I lost the state of Utah for Trump because of a hangover, but I digress.

I just love it when I find that someone is a bigger scumbag than I am, and by golly I found two this week. Your Wife is So Ugly goes into the comments and re-Tweets between Donald Trump, and Ted Cruz, as they try to figure out who’s old lady is the bigger floozy!  Now Ted came up short here. He’s just married, but Don! He’s got it all figured out. After he wears out one wife, he just marries another world class model. It’s good to be the king! Hey. . . works for me! Cruz blubbered like a little girl after Trump put up a picture of his wife’s face, and Trump counter attacked by paying the National Enquirer to run pictures of all of Ted’s girlfriends. These guys are running for president! Poor Obama just danced a tango down in South America somewhere, but the wife war took the media by storm. I’d love to take the moral high ground, and say I was offended by all this, but I’m not. I’ve been married six times, and under Texas law I have one tag left on my “Dear” license. But, wait! Under the ruling of the Supreme Court there is a slim possibility that polygamy could be reinstated. Then, I could find me three or four of these Mormon chicks, marry them all, and count that as one marriage. I shoulda been a lawyer, really, I should.

Your Wife Is So Ugly . . .


I’m amazed at the dignity this election cycle has brought out. We began with “hand sizes,’ and now we’ve progressed all the way to ugly wives and battle boots. “Your wife is so ugly. . . “I took off after Ted Cruz’s wife the other day, which was stupid, I may meet this guy someday, I mean we’re both from Texas, and there he’ll be. God! He may even be president. Will that make me a liberal? Never let it be said that I’m not an equal opportunity offender, I slobbered over Trump’s wife’s butt, too. He’s got a drop dead gorgeous daughter, also.

I think it’s interesting to note that whomever ran that picture of Mrs. Trump’s butt, all Don did was run a picture of Cruz’s wife’s face and Ted went off like a bazooka. The refreshing thing was that we got off of walls on the borders, and got on arguments about wives. Let’s do some demographics. Ted is a Texan. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he was born in Canada, dad was a Cuban, dispense with that. Ted’s not from Texas, but he got there as fast as he could, and he thinks like a Texan. Mr. Trump, on the other hand, thinks like a Yankee. And he’s a New York Yankee, which is about as Yankee as you can get.

So, we’ll get to watch the Twitter war most likely for the remainder of the campaign, at which time the Republicans will broker the convention and Hillary will get elected. Ya’ll didn’t see that coming, huh? That’s because you still don’t know who your handlers are. These guys love this nonsense. The more Trump and Cruz hack at each other, the more they like it. Sitting in the wings is that other guy running, and he’s exactly the kind of loser the Republican establishment wants to pit against Hillary to assure the results, and continue the status quo. Ever hear of Mitt Romney? Wait a minute! Didn’t Romney just activate a bank account and throw his hat into the ring? Smoke and mirrors. All bokem and bosh.

Actually, Donald Trump is the only person who can take Hillary on head on. He’s rich, he plays dirty, and he has staff! Hillary has more luggage than Brittney Spears at a pot party, and she knows it. Combine with that that she’s still married to Bill, and frankly, she makes Bill look good! Hey, like my friend, Juan says, “I ain’t even gonna lie to chew,” I thought that pizza with Monica in the Oval Office was cooler than dry ice, myself, but I’m just a Simple Ol’ Boy From Austin, so what do I know?

What will be interesting is watching what the powers that be do at the convention when Trump shows up with all the votes needed to just walk away with the nomination. That’s gonna be a sticky one. That’s going to expose the system for what it is, and make Alex Jones look like a prophet. Hey, I’ve been in Utah for a couple of weeks, and I’m thinking about prophets a lot, bear with me, ok?

Meanwhile, ISIS is blowing Europe of the map, there are more Mexicans on the border than ever, Finicum is still dead, there are so many abortions each day that you’d think Planned Parenthood should put up one of those signs like McDonald’s used to have saying, “Billions Served,” and Hillary has just had a photo op with Bruce Gender. Myself, I’m on the elusive pursuit of a good cup of coffee in the land of Bibles, Books of Mormon, and girls who look like Marie Osmond. A man has to keep perspective.

Trump’s Wife Loses Utah

Ok, Donald Trump’s wife lost the Utah caucus. I’m at a loss here, I didn’t know she was running. It seems that somebody dredged up a picture from a magazine where Trump’s wife did a spread that showed her butt. I’ve seen the photo, and it was an exquisite butt. Hey, I’m not gay, ok? That having been said, if I ever meet Donald I’m not going to say, “Hey, your old lady sure has a nice butt. Now, of course, Cruz said he had nothing to do with that. That’s kinda like my grandkids pointing to each other when something goes wrong. Five kids in the house and nobody saw anything. Like being in the “hood” when the cops come around.

Ring the bell, school’s in. Deep seated religious convictions are hard to beat. In Utah you have a very high percentage of LDS women who vote. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world, and Christian religious conviction is what we need at this particular time. Very strong influence of morality, family, and decency go a long way when that finger reaches for that little switch in a voting booth. Now, let’s look at some facts, shall we?

The Republican establishment has launched an attack on their own front runner. Now, why would they do that? They are doing that because Donald Trump is not establishment. Cruz is. Hillary is. Above all, they want to assure that when this is all over it will be business as usual. They want that border open. They want that money in the Social Security bank. They want a Mosque on every corner, and they want to maintain control. If Trump wins they lose all of that. It’s that simple. If they can’t find anything else, they drag out a nude picture of Donald Trump’s wife! Thank God we were spared a picture of Obama’s wife’s butt.

So, let’s peel the veneer off of Heidi Cruz. She is an American investment manager at Goldman Sachs. She was born in California (I’m very suspicious about that) went to college in Brussels, and at Harvard. Sounds good. She’s forty-three years old, and she’s cute. I had to throw that in. Sorry. She had a bout with depression early in her marriage, but I don’t hold that against her, I go through that after every divorce. My last one lasted twenty-six minutes because that’s how long it took me to drive to the JP’s office to get married again, but I digress.

She became involved in her husband’s run for the senate, and reportedly cashed in all of their assets to finance the venture. It was not reported about the loan she secured from Goldman Sachs. Now, this is not a really big deal, I suppose they paid the loan back, and I see Goldman Sach’s angle, it’s always nice to buy a senate seat, but then Don’s previous life is not something that should sway the political winds either. This was a dirty trick, similar to Iowa. Remember that. Ted Cruz is showing a Nixon like persona that smacks a little of Huey Long. Dig, strike, deny.

One other little thing. Ted Cruz cannot beat Hillary Clinton. He doesn’t have that kind of clout. While Trump feverishly tried to throw a sheet over his wife it is well known that Hillary dated Yoko Ono, but what does it matter? Clout enough for ya? Ted Cruz is the little boy in the school yard and Hillary is the school master. She survived Monica! But, Ted won Utah. I guess that means something. With his wife’s love of the North American Union, Goldman Sachs, and the New World Order I’m sure the people of Utah will be getting an education real soon.

Like I said, it’s hard to beat religious conviction. This is the people of Utah voicing their opinion, and I have no problem with that.  I only hope that that conviction enables wisdom enough to ignore an attack on a man’s wife that was purposely designed to push emotional buttons on people who don’t see the big picture, and the big picture is their state sovereignty, the loss of their faith, their bill of rights, and their children’s future. One picture is worth a thousand words. If you wanna see the back story just look at Ted’s right hand in the picture on this article. I can say no more!

The Two Weeks That Were

I missed my weekly summary last week because I was on the road so this is the TWO weeks that were. I’m up in Utah for a week or two, and I’m getting plugged into the climate, both weather wise and political. My sinuses cleared up. God, I hope I’m not allergic to Texas. I touched on something yesterday, and I’m going to start off there. In Them and Us I tried to tie in the common interests of Utah and Texas, which are profound. Brigham Young was a lot like Donald Trump. Now, the man had his ways, but he took a group of people and struck out for the desert to found a nation, and a culture, and like Texas, the LDS people are clinging to their heritage. My message was, “We are with you. You are not alone.”

Guns, Glory, and Midgets was in response to some fool who went after me on gun control. This guy was a classic, and I just couldn’t put him away. This is a real danger, people. These people are out there, and they make kids! I can’t believe that a man who thinks like this has the brain cells to power a heart and liver, but I’m not a doctor. Talk about zombie. Here it is, I say HERE IT IS!

Suspicious was actually three ideas that came together that was sent to me by Kate Beecham, Casey Nunez, and Teddy Bear. I began to see a common denominator and tied them up with a pretty bow.

The Law of the Jungle was in answer to the current rage of protesting Donald Trump’s rallies. Was it racist enough for ya? Hey, Ah’m from TEXAS, and I don’t buy into Political Correctness one little bit.

Ain’t No Run When The Rabbit’s Got The Gun was after I watched LaVoy Finicum’s daughter wipe her nose and talk about her daddy. God! I love that  kid! If you ever have any doubt about what we are up against just pull your head out of Mr. Butt, and look this little girl in the face.

Dramatic New Footage From Oregon. One picture is worth a thousand words, and this was the one picture that clearly shows a government that is out of control. The cell phone footage from inside the SUV in Oregon shows terrified people, a useless attack, and a man that was no threat to the officers. Finicum was on his way to a sheriff. Why were the Oregon State Police, and FBI so scared of a sheriff?

The Enemy Within dispels the myth of Carlos the friendly orange picker. Our borders are under attack. No other country in the world puts up with what we have going on down there, and the administration tries to make Americans who scream about it look like a bunch of irrational fanatics. Point of fact: ONE Mexican got over the White House fence and almost shut down the government. If you go to the Texas border you’d think you were at the Alamo. Yet again, Trump is on point, and keeps sticking that point to the government time, and time again.

As a complimentary piece San Jacinto Redux puts flesh on the bones of illegal immigration. My man in the street, Teddy Bear, has identified the organized effort to place not orange pickers, but soldiers in place, all over America, for the day when they rise up, with the help of the UN, and take over the country. Scary stuff if you’re not a Texan. Houston knew the remedy for the Alamo, and we know the one for this.

Thought I’d give a little lesson in politics so I wrote See Ted Run. Simple piece, really, with a simple message. Since this article, Rubio dropped out, and Cruz is jockeying for a VP slot. Times sure change fast.

Think I can’t be Politically Correct, or sanitize a piece?  I wanted so BAD to call this one Super Tuesday and Hand Jobs, but opted for Super Tuesday and Hand SIZES. No wonder the Democrats laugh at us.

Man! I didn’t even know there WAS still a KKK until I wrote David Duke. Fact: If there is still a Klan the members have to show up in their wheel chairs and oxygen, but, they still scare the pants off of “some” people. All in all, this was a dirty trick by the Dems to discredit Trump just like the guys in sheets photographed holding Trump signs. You remember those guys. The ones with the black hands?

Even though I’m not a practicing Catholic anymore I still feel the need for confession and Arrested For Driving While Blind was it. I’d love to say I made this article up, but fact is I held back because I want to continue to work for the Trib.

And that was the weeks that were. I’m on vacation, but I’ll be back in Texas soon. Hopefully the politicians will continue to provide me with subjects to expound on, and the price of whiskey doesn’t go up too much. Ya’ll be cool. Peace out!