The Two Weeks That Were

I missed my weekly summary last week because I was on the road so this is the TWO weeks that were. I’m up in Utah for a week or two, and I’m getting plugged into the climate, both weather wise and political. My sinuses cleared up. God, I hope I’m not allergic to Texas. I touched on something yesterday, and I’m going to start off there. In Them and Us I tried to tie in the common interests of Utah and Texas, which are profound. Brigham Young was a lot like Donald Trump. Now, the man had his ways, but he took a group of people and struck out for the desert to found a nation, and a culture, and like Texas, the LDS people are clinging to their heritage. My message was, “We are with you. You are not alone.”

Guns, Glory, and Midgets was in response to some fool who went after me on gun control. This guy was a classic, and I just couldn’t put him away. This is a real danger, people. These people are out there, and they make kids! I can’t believe that a man who thinks like this has the brain cells to power a heart and liver, but I’m not a doctor. Talk about zombie. Here it is, I say HERE IT IS!

Suspicious was actually three ideas that came together that was sent to me by Kate Beecham, Casey Nunez, and Teddy Bear. I began to see a common denominator and tied them up with a pretty bow.

The Law of the Jungle was in answer to the current rage of protesting Donald Trump’s rallies. Was it racist enough for ya? Hey, Ah’m from TEXAS, and I don’t buy into Political Correctness one little bit.

Ain’t No Run When The Rabbit’s Got The Gun was after I watched LaVoy Finicum’s daughter wipe her nose and talk about her daddy. God! I love that  kid! If you ever have any doubt about what we are up against just pull your head out of Mr. Butt, and look this little girl in the face.

Dramatic New Footage From Oregon. One picture is worth a thousand words, and this was the one picture that clearly shows a government that is out of control. The cell phone footage from inside the SUV in Oregon shows terrified people, a useless attack, and a man that was no threat to the officers. Finicum was on his way to a sheriff. Why were the Oregon State Police, and FBI so scared of a sheriff?

The Enemy Within dispels the myth of Carlos the friendly orange picker. Our borders are under attack. No other country in the world puts up with what we have going on down there, and the administration tries to make Americans who scream about it look like a bunch of irrational fanatics. Point of fact: ONE Mexican got over the White House fence and almost shut down the government. If you go to the Texas border you’d think you were at the Alamo. Yet again, Trump is on point, and keeps sticking that point to the government time, and time again.

As a complimentary piece San Jacinto Redux puts flesh on the bones of illegal immigration. My man in the street, Teddy Bear, has identified the organized effort to place not orange pickers, but soldiers in place, all over America, for the day when they rise up, with the help of the UN, and take over the country. Scary stuff if you’re not a Texan. Houston knew the remedy for the Alamo, and we know the one for this.

Thought I’d give a little lesson in politics so I wrote See Ted Run. Simple piece, really, with a simple message. Since this article, Rubio dropped out, and Cruz is jockeying for a VP slot. Times sure change fast.

Think I can’t be Politically Correct, or sanitize a piece?  I wanted so BAD to call this one Super Tuesday and Hand Jobs, but opted for Super Tuesday and Hand SIZES. No wonder the Democrats laugh at us.

Man! I didn’t even know there WAS still a KKK until I wrote David Duke. Fact: If there is still a Klan the members have to show up in their wheel chairs and oxygen, but, they still scare the pants off of “some” people. All in all, this was a dirty trick by the Dems to discredit Trump just like the guys in sheets photographed holding Trump signs. You remember those guys. The ones with the black hands?

Even though I’m not a practicing Catholic anymore I still feel the need for confession and Arrested For Driving While Blind was it. I’d love to say I made this article up, but fact is I held back because I want to continue to work for the Trib.

And that was the weeks that were. I’m on vacation, but I’ll be back in Texas soon. Hopefully the politicians will continue to provide me with subjects to expound on, and the price of whiskey doesn’t go up too much. Ya’ll be cool. Peace out!


Slobber and Vote


Slobber, vote. When watching politics one must remember that. Donald Trump is unique in politics in that I cannot recall someone not versed in politics coming this close to nomination for the top slot. There is a vast array of contenders, agreed one less this morning. (Bye bye Bush “die-nasty.) There are ideals, prejudice, and historical influences that play into the mix, and folks, that never changes.  I’d like to begin by exploding a myth, and losing a couple million subscribers. Obama didn’t divide the country. WE did! The first black president just removed a band aide, and exposed the innate racism that was always there. (Tip of the hat to Kent Franks.) Politicians use racism, and boys and girls, it works! In Austin there is a painting, “Dawn at the Alamo,” and creeping up behind Col. Travis is a leering, crouching Mexican. Cartoon caricatures of Japanese in WWII had slits for eyes, and huge buck teeth. People are attracted by like people are repelled by UNlike people, to which when they are repelled they will assign attributes to those people, and if they can’t come up with any, a politician will be more than happy to fill in the blanks for them.

Donald Trump is a bell ringer. The general population is just a bunch of Pavlov’s dogs. You ring the bell, they Slobber at the mouth, and they vote. “Hope and change!” Slobber . . . vote! “Free college,” Slobber. . . vote!” “Them Meskins are the whole problem!” Slobber . . . vote!” Is this a bad thing? Not really. You have to get a certain amount of “Slobber, Vote” if you ever expect to gain office. This is how politics works. The trick is to demonize the other guy’s Slobber voters while elevating theirs! All Sanders supporters are a bunch of homosexual potheads, but Trump supporters are all New York stock brokers. See how that works? And all politicians play that good ol’ race card! Oh, they do it low key. They just count heads and demonize the losers by dodging the issue. Sometimes, it’s just a word. “Immigration.” Slobber. . . vote!)

“Oh, Wilbur, you just called most of the voting population a flock of ignoramuses!” Well, yeah. Only about three percent of the voters do so from an informed position. Informed being knowing what they want, and fully aware that any candidate is only going to deliver about a tenth of what they promised, but will go with the lesser of two evils. I don’t even know what the percent of voters are on food stamps, but I’m sure it out numbers the afore-mentioned employed voters, and boys and girls, the welfare vote is not predominantly black! Whites comprise 62.6% of the US population, while black run up to 13.2%. Unless you are a functional idiot you must conclude that the blacks simply do not have the sheer numbers to outrun us crackers down to the welfare office.

There has always been an awareness of our different backgrounds. We need to change “awareness” to “appreciation.” When a person my age even mentions this awareness young people cry, “RACISM,” because they don’t know anything else. They have been trained by their handlers to believe that is the trump card for any discussion, and if they can attach that tag to any candidate you get, “Slobber . . . vote!” While Sanders people are slobbering after “free stuff” Trump supporters are slobbering after Mexicans.

And Hillary. Do you want to know what’ll happen if she gets elected? Exactly what happened the last time she took office. Nothing! This woman has never achieved anything except a date with Yoko Ono. She lost her law license in 2002 for not competing her “MCE” (mandatory continuing education.) Now it’s uh, 2016! She’s a tad out of date, but shucks folks, it’s an Arkansas law license. Hey, Arkansas legal question: If you are married in Arkansas, and divorced in Arkansas, are you still brother and sister? All jokes aside, this woman has never done a thing in her life except marry Bill, and even he had to find a date. She comes up with nice little sound bites before congressional hearings, “What does it matter?” In public she smiles knowingly, but in private cusses like a sailor. I don’t know if she has a drinking problem, but I do know she can’t walk a straight line without falling and bumping her head, but no harm done, there’s nothing vital there. She is falling prey to the same thing that took Jeb Bush out last night; the unbending faith that the machine will pull her through, and it might. Slobber. . . vote!

Ted Cruz. Ted is a wild card. He knows how to play the game. And he’s not playing. If Ted had had his way a couple years ago he’d have put the entire government in the unemployment line. He knows the constitution, believes in God, America, and mom’s apple pie. Naturally he offends gays, illegal immigrants, movie stars, and Michael Moore. While these people have no problem at all with Obama’s lineage, they’re all bent out of shape by Ted’s father, birthplace, and skin tone. Hey, if a witch doctor from Kenya can be president so can Ted. At least he doesn’t believe that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain for Pharaoh. Sorry, Dr. Carson, but you really said that. (Is he still running?) Both Trump and Cruz demonstrate something that’s been coming for a long time. Remember that pendulum I told ya’ll about a long time ago. Well, it’s swinging back to the right. It has to go all the way to the right before it turns around again, and comes back. It never stops in the middle, folks. Slobber, vote! Trump has a huge following, and Cruz knows just how to take it, and run with it. Did anyone say, “Iowa?” And don’t give me that stuff about dirty tricks, or cheating, he just won!

The only way Bernie Sanders will take the nomination is if Hillary dies and her body disappears. If they still have the body, the Democrats will nominate that. Maybe they could elect the body, and just let Bill do the job. That’ll work. Anyway, wanna know why Romney didn’t win? ‘Cause he was a Mormon, that’s why. I pointed that out way back when he through his hat in the ring ink 2011, and years later the MSM tenderly approached that simple fact. Just understand, Sanders won’t win. Those who have ears, let them hear.

Hillary’s got the machine, Trump has the numbers, and Cruz has the know-how. That’s how it really breaks down.  When the gate opens, and the ponies run, you will see lots of sex, lies, and video tape. Hillary will wave aborted fetuses, Cruz will wave the Bible, and Trump will wave his wallet. On the first Tuesday of November the bells will ring, the polls will open, and the population will. . . Slobber and vote. God save the King!


Knockout. In a boxing or MMA match that’s usually the definitive moment. Iowa delivered some surprises Monday. One was Sanders coming on as strong as he did, but the main event was the Cruz/Trump event. I was mesmerized by the crowds at the Trump rallies, and frankly began to wonder why Ted Cruz was running at all. Trump was so confident he told Fox to shove it, doing his own show instead, and left Iowa early. Blame it all on his roots, Ted showed up in boots, and ruined Trump’s black tie affair!
Ok, let’s get to the crotch of this. That’s not a typo, it’s where Ted Cruz kicked Donald Trump Monday! The logic seemed to follow the theory that if you can make a billion dollars then you can run a country. Shucks folks, El Chapo can make a billion dollars. C’mon! As much as we don’t like it, politics is a vocation. Playing the crowd, and working the polls are two different things, and I’m not talking about opinion polls of people who may, or may not vote, I’m talking about people who actually get up and go and vote! Two different critters.
I love it when Trump talks about bombing the Arabs off the map, building the “Trump Wall” on the border, and booting all the Muslims out of the country, but do you really want that guy with his finger on the trigger? Ted Cruz is a master debater, and more than that, he’s a politician! I know that’s a bad word, but hey, we need proctologists, too, ok? He judged, worked, and played the numbers. The right numbers, not the media event.
Of course people will show up in a stadium to see Donald Trump. They’d show up to see Osama bin Laden, that’s just how people are. Everybody wants to get next to a “happening” guy. But, they don’t vote for him. While Trump was playing the crowd, Cruz was playing the numbers, and let’s be up front, Ted Cruz is a Senator! He’s done this before. An underdog who surprised almost everyone, and he surprised everyone but himself on Monday!
So, what’s a Donald to do? Well, he’s not going just dry up and blow away, the man’s a winner. One loss in a game he’s never played before is not going to give Donald Trump PTSD. He’ll hit the other primaries, and let’s look at this as it really is. Trump has drawn interest, if not votes, to issues that we’ve all got to address. We really do have to tighten up the immigration. Islam really is infected with the craziest pricks we’ve seen in a thousand years, and someone really should drop a few nukes on some camels to get the attention of the Middle East. Donald Trump has now made his mark. Ben Franklin never won the presidency either.
And now for the lighter side. In America we have to have a two party system. I mean someone has to run against someone to make it all at least look democratic. Therefore we have the Democrats. Hilliary and Bernie. That race was so corrupt they ended up in some kitchen somewhere flipping a quarter to see who won. They got the quarter from Bill so Hilliary won six out of six, go figure. Hillary won by the skin of her teeth, but no matter, everybody was watching Ted Cruz anyway. The funny thing is that she thinks she’s a powerhouse. This idiot is two horse lengths ahead of the posse and she’s galloping along like she has good sense.

Simple Ol’ Boy From Austin