The Lesser of Two Evils

You’re in the confession, and as the confessor to a large parish you often hear the confessions of those whose voice you cannot recognize. “Forgive me father for I have sinned” “How long since your last confession?” “Four years father”. “That is a long time. What was your sin?” “I was forced to blind a little boy.” “ What do you mean you were forced?” “He was witness to a crime committed by my employer and landlord father and it was either kill the boy or blind him to eliminate the possibility of his bearing witness.” “Don’t worry too much then my son, Jesus forgives when one must commit to an evil, and it is the faithful servant which commits to the lesser of two.”.

Sound about right? Every four years for most of my life, people have gone to the polls and committed the lesser of two sins. Like true suckers they do it over and over and over again, each time expecting the best, not the worst, this despite the fact that it is always the worst that results. When you voted for Bush instead of Gore did it help? I’m not saying Gore would have been better, but he could hardly have been worse.

When Jesus encountered the woman at the well he taught all and sundry a lesson about sin; He explained through his invitation to cast the first stone that all sin is… You know, sin. He did not say “Go forth and choose the smaller of proffered sins”, He said “Sin no more”!

Look, I get it that many of you are frustrated beyond telling that your candidates talk long and tough about abortion while giving not a jot or tittle while in office. Democrats have waited outside the locked door impatiently for greater economic freedom for the same time. In both cases the voting public gets punked! I know, it’s the whole checks and balances thing right? Wrong! During the Bush administration the Republicans had all three branches of government!!! Instead of an end to the practice of abortion we got two wars and the greatest theft of public moneys since Marc Antony robbed the temple of Jupiter. Then, how about that Obama? He promised explicitly the restoration of restrictions on banking, a cessation of the war on unions, and a lessening of our meddling in the political affairs of other countries. He even punked the Nobel peace committee!!! It seems pretty clear to me that while Romney may not have done any better, he couldn’t have done any worse.

Which brings us to the 2016 election, Frankenstein vs Dracula. Or, as I like to refer to it Madame Wannabe vs Little Adolf. Sorry if that offends anyone, but the whole affair offends me beyond description. I’d like to mention a moment in my personal life briefly. My children have approached me individually for advice about the upcoming election. My kids. Attaining maturity and replacing oneself appears to be the only reason we are here when looked at logically. Since replacement implies complete replacement inclusive of training and function checks, I have been happy to hang around making certain that I have not offered the creator an incomplete or lesser version of what I was fortunate enough to be able to make of what was given to me. I have begun of late to believe that my job has been finished, and I may be able to move on to what lies ahead with a clear sense of duty, when to my dismay I heard this: My response to their questions about what seems to many to be a dilemma was the usual. “Hey Dad, what can you tell me about the candidates that would help me choose one?”. I have assiduously concealed my political inclinations from my kids so that they might be free to make their own identities. Me: “What can you tell me? It’s a pretty confusing situation.”. Them: “Well, I really don’t know, I think I will have to vote for the lesser of the two evils.”. Me: No response due to constricting fear and shame.

Folks, there is no lesser of two evils here. I’m getting drunk on Election Day so that I can at least say I did something constructive with a straight face. Still, for those of you who plan to slink down to the polls and vote for whichever of the two fools you think may be the lesser of two evils, I say the following: You HAVE the government that you deserve already, and for God’s sake dont forget,Ten Our Fathers and Ten Hail Marys!


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