The Yellow Submarine

The Yellow Submarine
by Wilbur Witt

Saturday I had the most interesting talk with an old friend about guns and gun control. Now this friend is a big supporter of the second amendment. He helped get me through my required class and paperwork for my license to carry. He carries a pistol everywhere legally possible, and provides gifts of guns to all the women in his family, and more than one of these women has had occasion to be very grateful to him for that. That all having been said, he proposed a scenario to me. I had just returned from a Sam’s opening in Killeen. Crowds of people. Lots of children and women, old people, you name it. Everybody packed together, sampling free food, and taking advantage of the opening day sales.

He asked me to consider something. What if I were sitting there eating a free sausage, and in through the door walked a man with an AR15 slung over his shoulder? He asked me to tell the truth. Would I think this was a demonstration of second amendment rights, or would my survival instincts kick in and would I have visions of Sandy Hook, Fort Hood, Luby’s? I had to admit, reluctantly, that I would at the very least apprehensive, at the most I would ease the safety off on my gun. He then said that was the reason for the right to bear arms. If we are restricted in being able to protect ourselves and others, then we wait for the insane man coming into a store. We will have no choice, and. An only wait to see what the man will do. If the man is crazy then people will die. If we have armed citizens then the man will die. This is the sobering truth and the Government cannot fix this.

When we populated the Texas plains we brought Christianity and guns. There were people living here who thought nothing of killing an entire family for a few chickens. If they could not see the light of Christ then we showed them the flash of light at the end of a Winchester. My ancestor, Silas Witt, was one of those people. He was a soldier and Baptist Preacher, and he’d shoot you, bury you, and pray over you, but he would not endanger himself or his family for some wishy-washy ideal that would get everyone killed.

This is a bad world friends. I wish we all lived in a Yellow Submarine and ran half naked on the beach drinking wine but it is simply not so! When a young lady can’t walk to the store from my house three blocks away you have a sick society. And the world has always judged its civilization by the safety of its citizens. The Apostle Paul walked from Jerusalem to Rome. Now, he got crossways with Nero when he got to Rome, but he GOT there! Friends, this country is NOT that civilized! And if you liberal Democrats out there think it is, and we don’t need to defend ourselves, just let YOUR wife or daughter take a stroll through any city in thus country. Hey, have her wear jeans, and see how far she gets. I’m crazy you say! No, anyone who doesn’t recognize these cold, hard facts is having a major problem with reality.

You will never see this situation change in your lifetime. It’s going to take a long time to turn this run away train the Democrats and RINOs have out us on. There will be more mass shootings. There will be more calls for gun bans, but eventually, as citizens bring down shooters it will abate. And it will be violent. And it will be bloody. And liberals will wring crying towels, but just like we don’t have any more wild Indians, we eventually won’t have any more active shooters. But this will not happen with psychiatrists. This will not happen with sociologists. This will not happen with more police. This will happen with an armed populace that simply will not stand for any more. When some old man is being beat down by a gang of street thugs, and they soak up a hail of gunfire from the crowd you can bet it will send an electrifying message through the local gangs.

People, I really wish this wasn’t so. I really wish we could all live on that Yellow Submarine. I really wish rain were beer, and that we had universal peace and love, but I also realize that John Lennon is dead. And the Yellow Submarine died with him!



by Wilbur Witt

Now we all have to learn the term Al Shabab. This group of idiots joins the growing ranks of Islamic radicals roaming the world exacting terror on good people. I’m going to get right to the point. How long are civilized people going to put up with a religion that spawns this kind of crap? I was frankly surprised at the culture surrounding the mall that was attacked. The prominent people counted among the dead could have been Hollywood. And to attack, and kill these people? Allah must be very proud.

The Texan in me would say just nuke Somolia. We were almost at war in Syria just last week. I don’t give a damn about Syria. Nothing in my house is made in Syria. But somehow, the image of these people running out of a mall while deranged maggots shoot at them just, well, pisses me off. So nukes would work well. Give the “good” people in Somolia two or three days to leave and then turn the entire country into a nuclear wasteland.

And there are indications that there are Americans involved. Trained in the US! Why are we putting up with this? Are we crazy? Folks, there aren’t that many of these idiots. I think all the civilized nations of the world should meet
at the UN and just jump in this. What did the attackers hope to gain? I know
one thing, I have a lot of respect now for Kenya and for its president, who lost family this weekend.

I’ve read the Qu’ran. I know Moslems, but fellas, we gotta figure this out! The day is fast approaching when the Jihadist bluff is going to be called, the rage of decent people is unleashed and the result will make Hitler look like Pope John XXIII! You can beat a friendly dog for only so long before you get bit. Why am I so mad? Those people laying dead on the floor when their only crime was being a Christian and going to the mall for a weekend Starbucks! This is outrageous.

I’m not up on all the details, but no doubt I’ll get some mail about how wrong I am. I’ll just quote Judge Roy Bean. “I killed these people because they were bad men and the whores weren’t ladies!” Somolia needs to be wiped from the face of the planet.

What Gun Rights Are Really All About

A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.

How simple is that? I’ve been reading a huge mountain of court rulings citing this or that, trying to worm through this one simple passage. The word “militia” and “people” seems to mess with a lot of people. The English law was referred to numerous times. The issue is emotionally charged with yet another shooting of thirteen more people in Chicago just last night. That type of thing is exactly where I’m going here. As the American Republic falls apart, and people become disillusioned our streets will become less and less safe the ability of the common law abiding citizens to defend them selves becomes a central concern.

Now let’s get real here. You are not going to team up with your neighbors and jump on the Army in an armed insurrection. But let’s get more real. The Army isn’t the problem. It is no longer safe to go to your car before sun up and drive to Starbucks for a cup of coffee. America is overrun with junkies, have nots and out and out psychotics who will kill you for your shoes. There are gangs of two or three who will hit your front and back door at the same time while a driver waits to escape with your wallet AND your fourteen year old daughter. You can call 911 and eventually the police will show up with that chalk they carry. That’s horrible isn’t it? What to do? The solution is simple. As simple as that amendment I quoted at the beginning of this article. That same fourteen year old girl can stop a line backer if she has a gun and knows how to use it.

The possibility of a gun in a home is a serious consideration for any crackhead bent on kicking in a door. This is reality folks. All the liberals out there are probably gagging at my words but they have created this brave new world we’re all enjoying now. Gun free zones, tolerance of drug users, people who should clearly be in jail, or a psychiatric facility walking around among us are all combined to create a dangerous climate no civilized person would want to live in!

Most people are good and well intentioned. The elements that make our society dangerous are very small, so to take away self defense from the majority because of the actions of a few makes absolutely no sense at all. With animals running the streets are we to wait in our homes like sheep? In the home I live in I have witnessed first hand the street culture that is growing in our country now. This house was a crack house. Now let me explain to the uninitiated exactly what that is. The wife died. The husband was sick. He had Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s. The daughter and granddaughter were addicted to drugs and used prostitution to acquire their supply. They moved as many people as they could find into the once beautiful house. These people smoked crack, fornicated, and roamed the neighborhood robbing, returning to smoke more crack. They physically destroyed the house, and I’m not kidding. Defecating in the floors, kicking in the walls, and writing vulgar graffiti all over everything. As luck would have it my ex-wife married the sick man and immediately moved him into her house, saving his life.

I returned from California and they asked if I would occupy the garage apartment situated in the front of the house. When I first saw the house I was appalled. It was impossible to even step onto the spacious country porch in the back of the house because of the overturned furniture and human bodies passed out there. The drug pushers and clients formed a line at the front door and the business never slowed. All through the night they would dope up and howl like wild animals. I had stayed with my son when in California. We went to the desert a lot, and I hung with Navy and motorcycle enthusiasts. The residents if the crack house seriously mis judged me. My ex’s new husband asked me if I could do anything to help this situation.

The first thing I did was to secure my area. Next, I went to my storage and got my shotgun and my SKS 7.62 assault rifle. I put strong locks on my door and slept with my guns by my side. At first I laid back, not challenging the others as I learned. Several things became apparent. Surprisingly they had no guns! If they came upon anything that valuable it would immediately be sold for more crack. The other thing I figured out was that these people were physically weak and they were cowards. That was important. The first time I brought out a gun to break up a fight fifty percent of the customers left, never to return. After that it was one altercation after another until they were all gone. The daughter and granddaughter were last, leaving and returning until it ended with me being attacked in the front yard for money believed to be in my pocket that the daughter had told would pay for her crack. I won that event, but I drew a red line for the girls and made it very clear what would happen should they remain. These women had no conscious. They were evil incarnate. They had drugged my ex’s husband and put him in a room, patiently waiting on him to die. I calmly informed them that they were animals, and made it crystal clear what I I was prepared to do in order to get rid of them. They left and I moved in two renters who worked construction. There were subsequent attacks on all of us but the people were weak and it ended badly for them. The former occupants believed that there must be a “stash” somewhere in the house, and would continue to try to break in for several months. As they were hurt or sent to jail the attempts finally ended, we cleaned the house, renovated it and now where crackheads lived children now play.

Now, I have no illusions about these people. I also have no illusions about the police. If you think the police are going to protect you then you are going to die. How dangerous are our streets? Imagine getting some gas at a connivence store. Seems simple enough, doesn’t it? You step out of your car and walk toward the door retrieving your wallet. You never see the man who comes at you from your left side, hits you in the head with a rock, and runs away with your wallet. If he gets five dollars he’s ahead because that will get him one bump of meth. Oh, and yes, you can call the police and they’ll bring their little chalk.

The right of the people to keep and bear arms is very important. The police do not have guns to protect you, they have guns to protect THEM! In a fully armed populace the people are the ones who are in control, and are much safer than relying on help that may be an hour away. In a fully armed populace the drug addicts are very aware that there are consequences for their actions. In a fully armed populace your fourteen year old daughter wakes up in her bed in the morning!

I’m so sorry the nation is in this state of affairs. I wish it were not so. You’re better off in Texas than you would be in say, New York, where the possession of a gun, or for that matter, a Big Gulp is against the law. As Texas pulls away from the madness hopefully we can avoid some of the pitfalls the Americans have stumbled into. One thing will be a revised Bill of Rights, the second amendment saying, “Y’all can have guns!”


Texas is Texas and That is That

Texas and the Approaching Apocalypse
by Wilbur Witt

Please review this video.

Now, you ask yourself, why the big push to do something so seemingly stupid? Well, I’m going to tell you why, or as Obama would put it Ima gonna tell you. Yesterday I reviewed videos and articles about surviving the coming collapse of the American government and infrastructure. It was all about food shortages, SWAT teams, DHS, and 1.5 billion hollow point bullets. Time was that I would laugh this stuff off, but that was before the current administration. Now I don’t really think Obama is malicious enough to destroy America, but I think he’s too stupid to save it, or rather what’s left of it.

America is a failed enterprise and it’s their own fault. The had industry, they had wealth, they had the best constitution in history and they screwed the pooch, as my son would say. They printed hot checks and called it money, they pissed on the Bible and the flag, they murdered children, they marched off chasing windmills all over the world and all this was perfectly fine with the Nortes so long as there was a Hockey game on Friday night! They laughed at us when we screamed foul, and finally got themselves a lawyer for president who surrendered his license just before he was disbarred!

So now theyre wondering where their next sandwich is coming from. Well, friends and neighbors, if it’s up to me and a lot of people like me, it WON’T be coming from Austin, Texas! Did you think the money machine was going to keep on churning forever? Did you think that your inflated wages in Detroit would be endless while you turned out cars the Japanese laughed at? Did you really believe you could sit on your ass and big daddy in the White House was going hand you your daily bread? Well, as my old producer used to tell me, better pull your head out of Mr. Ass!

So how does this connect with someone carrying a black powder pistol onto the Capitol grounds in Austin? I’m a simple old boy from Austin and its as simple as this. As the national economy spirals out of control people will become hungry and agitated. As the government fails to deliver on false promises these people will finally get off their asses and start to try to survive. It is very important to the government that these people are fighting with sticks and stones while the SWAT teams are fully armed. Even the people in New York will fight to live.

Now for optimism. Texas is not in that bad of shape. We just out ran Iran in oil production. Ever try to buy a brisket in California? A Texan just beat a man to death for trying to rape his five year old daughter and the grand jury just laughed. We have legislated a Sunset law bringing the CPS under wraps. George Zimmerman got a WARNING ticket for speeding and welcomed to Texas! Need I go on? We are not America! Texas is Texas and that is that!

Controlling riots in LA is far removed from beating up a fully armed populace with enough to eat, water to drink, and utilities. And that’s why the man walked up on the Capitol Friday with a black powder pistol! It was both symbolic and practical. You see, for the uninformed we, in Texas are allowed to carry such things. Always have, and always will, and if that cop was “alarmed” then he needs to haul his ass to New York or LA and get a job with the CPS! The Obama administration is hell bent to have everyone believe that even drawing a picture of a gun is illegal. Texas was founded by people who used guns to fight tyranny. And we never stopped, folks! You see, that’s what’s wrong with America. They have forgotten what it takes to keep everything on the up and up. In Texas we know the police can’t protect you. The government can’t feed you. The FED can’t make you rich. The PEOPLE do that for themselves. I must have watched a dozen “survival” videos yesterday, all willing to take my credit card information to sell me some “kit” to help me “survive.” We know that all we need to survive is to get rid of the luggage and have a good, strong Republic, and to do that we don’t need cops dressing up like the Empire on Star Wars yelling at old ladies at the top of their lungs.

That man on Friday put the police on notice. The line is drawn. God Bless the Republic of Texas!

All This Talk About The Republic of Texas

All This Talk About The Republic of Texas
by Wilbur Witt

When Americans hear talk about declaring for republic it sounds like a bunch of nuts in East Texas are smoking their home grown. In reality the movement is growing. Very responsible folks from Houston to El Paso are jumping on this idea. Like I’ve said before, no one in their right mind believes that we can just pull away without a major reaction from the Nortes and a lot of gunfire. So just how do we plan to do this?

Well, Texas has always had an independent mindset. Distrust of Washington is built into that thinking. We watch places like California and New York and we SEE what the American dream really is. An outgrowth of that us people and businesses moving toward making it more and more difficult for American business to DO business in Texas. We watch the Arabs rake in dollars on their oil while Texas refineries crumble. We watch one administration after another stumble into wars where we have no business, and we are slowly, but surely setting that Republic mindset in stone…TEXAS stone!

The sad fact of the matter is Congress no longer represents the American people and the only hope the people of Texas really have is to find a way to represent themselves. Also, Texas is hemmoraging cash to the failed American government as its cities go broke. If we could just stop THAT it would be almost as good as declaring for Republic. Austin is far more open than Washington when it comes to involvement by citizens. Rick Perry listens. Obama talks from teleprompters. Rick stumbled over his lines during a presidential debate, but he didn’t even stutter when when he talked about the Republic. Being a consummate politician he knows the road to independence will be rocky, but he’s Texan enough to know that it will not go away.

You are going to see a weening of Texas away from the USA as the years drag by. You will see an exodus of people and businesses tomTexas as the opportunity here becomes more and more obvious to people in America. Each one will be one more brick in the wall that is steadily being built invisibly around Texas. This place started as a second chance for Americans, and now is evolving into a last chance for them. It will be slow. You won’t see an Alamo like battle, or American tanks in the streets of Dallas. What you will see is more and more businesses popping up around Texas where people are just plain tired of being used by a system that is aloof, and no longer cares.

Facts About Syria

What We Know About Syria
by Wilbur Witt

In the media swirl concerning Syria it becomes hard to sift the information, and misinformation to get to the facts. We know there was a gas attack and that a good amount of people died, including some children. Now that’s a fact. Put that in the fact basket. We know that there are two sides to the conflict in Syria. There’s the government, and then there are those who oppose the government. The opposition is composed of many factions, some Syrian, and some not so Syrian, filtering in from other areas to support the rebels. Some are referred to as terrorists. Let’s define terrorist. A terrorist is someone who kicks your ass and doesn’t care how he does it while you scream, “Foul!” You know, like the Confederacy. I dug back and read up on how this whole mess started. Apparently there were some protests against the Assad regime and he, upon seeing what else was happening in the Middle East, over reacted. One thing led to another and a protest became a conflict. Now we have a war.

Let me inject another fact here. If using chemical weapons is against international law, why is anyone allowed to even possess such weapons? If there IS a United Nations (which frankly there is not) shouldn’t there be a consensus among the members that if any nation even has these things the members would instantly invade said nation and disarm it with no ceremony?

Now let’s address just who used this weapon. The admitted owner of the gas is the regime. There’s no question there. Put that in the fact basket. Now let’s move to supposition. Let’s say, just for speculation, the opposition had come upon a few barrels of Sarin gas. Now where would you use it? Would you use it against civilians, fighting on your side to promote some great political maneuver, and try to drag the United States into the conflict, or would you just gas the hell out of Assad’s troops and turn the tide of the war? Moreover, if the more radical elements possessed this stuff, wouldn’t they have gassed the New York subway system by now? The whole idea of radical Islam is to destroy the Great Satan, which is us! Now that supposition is not a fact, it falls more in the common sense basket. We just took an attack on the Boston Marathon from pressure cookers loaded with nails and firecrackers. Don’t you think that if these people had poison gas they would have already figured a way to deploy it on us by now?

No, my belief is that Assad, having a pocket of resistance so near, thought he could pop a little gas in there and either not get caught, or would be ignored in the confusion of war. His assertion that he is winning the war, why should he resort to such tactics is about as strong as Batista enjoying a champaign toast as Castro enters town! Most likely that gas was deployed from government sources. The reason was that the government thought they could take out a pocket of resistance easy with little or no consequences.

Now it’s question time. What will happen if we attack? Will it save the world from gas? Uh, no. If it should topple Assad’s government will that end the war? Why sure! I mean, it ended the war in Iraq when we toppled THAT government, right? Oh, I’m sorry. The radicals are slipping in from where? Will the people that end up in control embrace us as friends and sell us gasoline at twenty five cents a gallon because they love us so much? Well, Libya is such a great tourist destination, right? Anybody up for a tour of the pyramids by the way? Maybe a Christian tour of Mecca?

What will China and Russia do. Bitch and rattle their rusty sabers. Iran, pretty much the same. I know I’m gonna get a bunch of letters telling me how powerful these numb nuts are, but I’m sorry to be the first one to tell you this, but for all of Putin’s big talk he has a rust bucket Navy and China’s not going to give one penny of profit up trying to protect a bunch of religious nuts that are doing them absolutely no good. You can put all that in the fact bucket, too.

Now, let’s swing to the other side of this discussion. One thing that riles me is when the government has this so-called “evidence” of this or that, and want to go to,war, but they can’t show us this evidence because we’re basically a bunch of children and can’t be trusted with the information. Show us one picture of Assad pushing the gas button, laughing with fiendish glee. Play us one audio tape of ANYONE in his government giving the order to deploy the gas. But no! That’s all CLASSIFIED! We can’t know that stuff.

What if, just what if the congress and the senate votes and says, “HELL NO!” Do you honestly think that the administration will not take some action anyway? If Obama shows restraint then I’m a blue nose gopher, and Frenchi says I can butter her butt, and call her a biscuit! We’re gonna do it, ok? It would be wonderful, if after all these years we could show some sanity and rebuild America, but I’ve long since given up on that. God Bless the Republic of Texas!

The “N” Word and the Bubble Headed Bleach Blonde

We’re All Racist
by Wilbur Witt

Everyone who is not in a coma has racist thoughts, and if you say you don’t, then you’re a lying racist. It’s built into the human condition. We are programmed from birth to accept or reject conditions around us, and when you try to artificially sterilize that you get people from New York City, or worse yet, San Francisco!

I get a great deal of amusement watching news commentators tap dance around a word. With great pain on their faces, and concern in their eyes, they say the phrase, “N” Word with great religious fervor, but it’s all a scam. Using a phrase like that just shows that you are a weak, stupid racist. I’ve made a point to point things like this out over the years. The people who actually know me know what I think, and how I define my opinions. I refer to myself as a simple old boy from Austin precisely because I do these things. I go right to the point, call a spade a spade (uh oh, bad choice of words) and watch politically correct people sidestep. When someone uses “the ‘N’ word” that’s not their opinion, that’s what someone TOLD them was their opinion, and like sheeple they follow the leader. Well, folks, black people see through this!

People can’t be trained not to think the way they should think, and any effort to appear to be something you’re not is disingenuous. You’ll just come across as the convalescing fool that you really are. I don’t call anyone a nigger. I also don’t refer to food as vittles because I realize that the word is from a bygone age and simply doesn’t fit in the 21st century. I’m not politically correct, but I think I may have progressed past my Louisiana roots where such words were tossed around randomly. I do use words like, lowlife, lying and loser because I still see lowlife, lying losers trying to run the country. I am not prejudiced, but I’m highly suspicious of anyone outside of Texas.

But words are words. Nothing more, nothing less. If you try to degrade anyone with a word, and not simply prove your point with logic then you have already lost your debate. If America is to work it must work for everyone and not because some government edict says so, but because it is right to do so. The US is diversified. Kids WILL wear their pants showing their underwear, you WILL see Spanish on labels, and for a while we will all have to put up with a bubble-headed bleach blonde in Burbank stuttering out “the ‘N’ word!” Then, one day, the good Lord willing, and the creek don’t rise, we’ll just all grow up. And I happen to like Bubble-headed bleach blondes, I just don’t like it when they speak.

Four Loco

I’m going to expound on yesterday’s post. It’s not worth a blog, but I want to talk about it here. First off, the person I was talking about has a room here at the house because he’s finishing up the tile work on the renovation. Now I drink. Ok, let’s get that right out in the open. I like martinis, and wines. I have had my physicals and except for a little blood pressure I’m doing great in my Autumn years. I sit by the pool, have wine and cheese, talk with guests, and go to bed . . .alone. The next morning I greet the sun beside the same pool. I smoke cigars and Pall Mall cigarettes, and anybody who doesn’t like it can kiss my redneck ass. What I DON’T do is get drunk and call people faggots, pedophiles, bums, useless, or delusional.

What stated out as a normal evening progressed into a lecture as this “person” found his way through about six “Four Locos.” For the uninformed a Four Loco is one of those drinks that tastes like soda pop designed for men who don’t have the testosterone for a man’s martini, just saying. Now, I live in my husband in law’s house. He, and my ex-wife live in what was once my house about a mile from here. Tipping my hat to my kid sister I won’t drag out all of the family laundry, suffice to say that I pay my way and provide them with many things that make this whacky set up work very well, and all principle players are quite pleased with the set up, ok?

Well, about four Four Locos down the road this old boy’s mouth shifts into gear. It started low key. He told me my ex’s husband was irritated because I was here. Now, Joe (my husband in law) was in the next room chowing down on a pork roast I’d prepared for him, having a fantastic Sunday. He had just asked me if a friend of mine was going to come down from Cali to help him build a studio and sound stage for filming. Mr. Four Locos told me that Joe was mad because he didn’t want to support me and my gay lover. Ok, the train just jumped the tracks and was proceeding across a cotton patch fueled by Four Locos. Let me make this perfectly clear, I am not a homosexual. I spent a good deal of time in Austin and have many gay friends. One of my more successful
Blogs has been on gay marriage, but I’m straight. My only criteria for female companionship is that she has to be beautiful, and I check IDs.

I just sat there and let him talk. From that point he told me how useless I was, imposing on everyone. Then I was delusional. He even said my car (Mersedes Special Edition SLK) was a stripped down “welfare” car that people who couldn’t really afford a Mercedes would buy. Gee, I hope not. I was kinda proud of that car. Then came the knock out punch. Upon observing my granddaughter sit on my lap and give me a kiss on the cheek, whereupon I patted her on her little butt and sent her off to play, he announced that I was a pedophile! At this point I decided to just go ahead and shoot him, but the day was late, and I was tired, and, you know, bullets cost money, and I am living on a fixed income. He expounded this point for some time while I listened and ate the olives from my martini.

Then he said I was jealous of my ex’s sex life, which he described in vivid detail. I’m a weird guy. I’ve been divorced a lot. There’s this little switch in my head that Mary Ellen put there that turns off when I divorce. A divorce is a legal device where two people admit they can’t get along even while screwing. I NEVER have sex with ex-wives, and brothers and sisters, I have a LOT of ex-wives! This is the only point I countered with a simple, “No, I don’t roll like that!” I LIKE being divorced. I LIKE pretty young girls swimming in my pool. I LIKE getting up in the morning and doing what the hell I want to do!

Finally, this jackass went to the barn, and I calmly got his bi-polar girlfriend drunk. Good always comes from bad. As I listened to each one of his ejaculations I began to realize I’m a pretty cool guy. Everything he said was exactly the opposite of what I really am. Like Willie said, “After taking several readings, I’m surprised to find my mind’s still fairly sound.” So today Mr. Four Locos got in his beat up van and counted his change on the way to the 7/11. Hey, this is a good article. I take that back. I AM going to publish this.